So this weekend was Dewey’s marathon for Calleigh. I just have to say that I am SUPER impressed he did it in 2 hours! Seriously, even when someone has trained for it, I think running a marathon in 2 hours is amazing! GO DEWEY!!!! Calleigh says you did awesome! :)
Recently I got my iPod back out and started listening to some old songs that I used to love. One of them got my attention as something I really want my daughter to think about, as well as help me remember a few things, especially about the wonderful man I married.
“I don’t buy the lines in magazines that tell me what I’ve got to be;
Don’t base my life on a movie screen, I don’t fit the mold society has planned.
Don’t need to be 19 years old or starve myself for some weight I’m told;
Or turn men’s heads, been down that road, and I thank God I finally know just who I am.
I ain’t a movie star, may never see the view from where they are. And this old town may be as far as I’m going.
What he’ll hold tonight in his hands, he swears is so much better than anything that this old world can show him.”
Sung by Trisha Yearwood
Too often I look at the skinny women around me and wish I was back to the size I was when I was younger. I know, I am not overweight, and I did lose a lot of the baby weight pretty fast, but it’s still hard with the tiny women around me. I look at my mother and see that she looks fabulous for her age, and I hope I look as good as her at her age. But her security in that is not what I think it should be.
So with the two of us as insecure about ourselves it makes me think of two things. One – I want to start a lifestyle that treats my body well. I want to work out, and be active so that I can be confident in who I am. I don’t need to be super skinny, but I want to be fit so that later in life I can also be confident. But Two – I want to be confident in myself no matter what the scale says. I want to be healthy but not obsess over the weight, because I don’t want my daughter to think that a certain weight is what defines me, or her. Especially since while I try to keep the weight off, she will be trying to put weight on. And that is scary to me.
I want her to realize that a real life woman is worth more than a skinny model. Kevin will love me no matter if I gain 10 pounds or lose 10 pounds. Having a husband love you for who you are is worth so much more than the 15 pounds I feel I want to lose. I want Calleigh to find that kind of love.
Prayer for Calleigh: Lord, please heal my daughter. Please help her little lungs to continue to give her body the oxygen it needs. Help her little pancreas to continue to accept the help that the enzymes give her. Thank you that she is getting her teeth in, please help ease the pain that comes with it. Father, I ask that you hold her hand throughout life. Walk with her, carry her when she needs you, and allow her to feel your presence at all times. Thank you that she is happy, loving, and capable. Please give her confidence in herself, in her beauty and in You. Lord, I pray that she finds a husband like her Daddy, Uncle Aaron and Crappaw, solid, Jesus loving men. Thank you for letting me borrow her from you for a while and give me strength to give her back to You as You ask her to do Your Work. :)
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